Fast Forward

We have been in Philadelphia 7 months and 1 day. So much has happened since we arrived and we have gone on so many wild rides. First, we were separated from the kids because we were here and Weston was so sick. We were told Weston was going to die which was horrible. Thankfully, he is a fighter and Adam and I beat the heck out of his back with this vibration thing 24 hours a day to get the pneumonia out of his lungs and he not only survived but he did better than he had. Then, we brought the kids up when things were a bit more stable. We agreed they would stay until after Christmas or until Weston's transplant-whichever came first. We were so hopeful that he would get a transplant during the holidays. Holidays are the big transplant time-but they have came and went now. I have been worried about how I would feel this week about no transplant and I am not going to lie, it is heartbreaking to know that he needs something to desperately and there is nothing that we can do but wait. The kids went back to Tennessee on New Years Eve. It was bittersweet. We knew that we were going to have to send them to minimize the germ risk during cold and flu season for Weston but we will miss them and their wild ways. The apartment has been so sad and boring since they left. I have pretty much decided that 1) I would never do well living alone and 2) I will probably not do so hot when the kids move out of the house.

Ellie is growing and can arrive anytime. Ideally, baking for another week would be great but since it feels like she is kicking my lungs, I believe she is ready to exit. My doctor said that I have to stay in the hospital for 48 hours after she is born. I feel that is excessive since I am going from 1 hospital to go sit in the CICU at CHOP where there are zillions of doctors just in case something went wrong. I will push for an early departure once I see how labor goes. The only labor that I really had a hard time recovering from was Sutton and with him, I lost so much blood that my blood pressure kept dropping and I kept passing out-even after I had been discharged. I feel so fat at the moment. Maybe it is because I can't breathe or because Weston insists on me getting up and down a bazillion times to do things for him which makes me groan and pant. I can't wait to lose the weight. I am usually never worried about dropping the pregnancy weight but I am also usually at home running after the kids and it just falls off. I love my Zumba class at home so I am hoping to get Zumba for the Wii so I can do it pretty soon after Ellie is born. I have the 30 Day Shred too that I did before I got pregnant and it is a good workout-probably not for the super athletes out there-but I liked it just fine. I just can't wait to hold sweet Ellie and bend over without thinking I might throw up.

Looking at the year ahead, everything is so up in the air. Everything depends on Weston's transplant. Our family is on hold and it is frustrating to have no control over anything. Our main friends up here are hospital staff. I told Adam we need to work on that. Being here has put things in such a different perspective. So, I keep thinking, fast forward hopefully 6 months or so, and I will be blogging about how we are going home, how great his transplant went, and how excited we are to finally get back to Blountville. I still need to post picts from Christmas. I promise to do that soon-or at least before next Christmas.